Have you ever found yourself being angry after your team wins because you didn’t get as much ice time as you wanted?
You know you should be excited that your team won, but you are mad that you didn’t get the chance to contribute as much as everyone else. How do you win gracefully when you are glued to the bench when it counts?
I could see this “winning anger” in some of the Team Ontario players’ eyes when they came off the ice last night. Even though they just helped their team with the National Championship, they were mad they didn’t get to play as much as everyone else. I totally know how they were feeling - I have been in that position more than a few times. Your team wins a huge game, a big tournament or even a major championship and you know that you should be happy. But there is just something that doesn’t feel quite right about celebrating when you are a spectator from the bench and the rest of your team is doing all the hard work to win.
You know that you helped the team get to that point - whether you played 20 shifts or only got 3. You know that there is no “I” in team and you should be genuinely happy for your teammates and yourself for winning the big game. But sometimes winning the national championships sucks when you are a bench warmer instead of a go-to player.
You don’t always get to choose the role that you play on the team, but you do get to choose how you play it. You may not get the chance to be the hero, but that doesn’t mean that you stop being a great teammate. It is really hard to cheer on your teammates when inside your head all you are thinking is, “Why isn’t the coach putting me out there? What did I do wrong? Why is she getting to go out on the ice instead of me?”
Coaches know that every player wants to be out on the ice when it really counts. And while you have every right to be angry, you have to do everything in your power not to show it. Do you think that a coach is going to want to put you out on the ice during the last two minutes of the next game if you aren’t supporting your teammates now?
You have to “fake it until you make it”. Cheer for your teammates. You don’t have to become the world’s greatest cheerleader on the bench, but you do need to be happy that your team won - even if it isn’t completely genuine at the time. Because if you want to be the hero for the team the next time around, you’ve got to be a great teammate this time around.
How do you stay positive and happy on the outside when your lack of playing time is eating you up on the inside?
Share your tips for how to “fake it until you make it” below.
We had the final today for our tournament and the other goalie got the start, I find it really stressful being on the bench knowing that I can’t do anything when it’s in our end so during the game I visualize myself playing because I never know when or if I’m going to play. During the game I analyze the game, watch the other goalie, see what my teammates can do to play better or what they did that was good.
When we won the game I was still excited because we scored to go ahead with just over a minute to go in the game, but when we tied this team 0-0 during round robin, I was happy but knew I could have done it too.
I just congratulated the girls, put a little smile on my face and just suck it because my team is happy and I don’t want to be a downer for my team after they won a hard fought final against our arch rivals, who we lost to 5-1 and 3-1 in the final at their Thanksgiving tournament last month.
The hardest part is when the coaches and parents say everyone played a great game, well I didn’t play and I only took 3 shots in warm up, or the very worse is when someone tells you directly “you played great” when you didn’t even play, I just smile and say thanks.
If you stick with it your day will come and when it does you can help lead the players that aren’t playing as much as they would like.
I would ask the coach why I’m not getting any playing time and what coach expects in order for me to start. I’d also do whatever I could to improve the weak part of my game. Try to bring the coaches attention at you during practice, and show him why your better. Cheer on the other goalie during games as loud as you can. Challenge yourself with hand eye drills and stuff. Allways keep a good attitude!
Today I was really really tired. Tonight I did my TFH program. I feel better. I’ve been working on my push ups too. Tonight I did 60. I did 10, then 20 and then 30! The last 30 weren’t as good as the first 30, but they were close. I also switched to 5 pound hand wieghts instead of 10. I’m doing the same amount of presses, only now I’m doing them as fast as I can.
See ya!
Amy
PS Congratulations Kim! You are a good coach!
I’m going to talk to my coaches on either Friday at our game or Monday at our next practice. Right now I know the reason why I’m not being played, the other goalie played ‘AAA’ pee wee last year with our current head coach and won this tournament last year and she won the provincial championship and I played ‘C’ bantam last year for another association. She’s already proved to the coaches that she can play when it matters, I just need to prove to them that I can play, especially when it matters.
Good job with your push ups Amy, I’ve improved from 6 to 10 in 5 days. I’m slowly working on it.
You too. I hope you get a chance to prove to your coach that you deserve a chance!
Amy
Last year I was one of the two first years playing on the Bantam AA team and I didn’t necassarily get played at the most important parts of the game. But if my coach did put me on the ice at a critical moment, I would work as hard as I could to prove to my coach that he made a good choice. By the end of the season he would put me on at the end of tied games and important moments. Just work your butt off!
When you don’t get to play that much it’s usully means that you are not having a very good game or maybe it’s a really important game and your team really has to win and you’re not one of the best players on the team. I got sat last weekend and it did make me mad. I tried not to show it but it was frustrating. I wasn’t going to let that happen today so played really hard. I played a really good defensive game. I won lots of battles. I also made good first passes out of our zone. I was on the ice for the last minute of the game. I played my role.
See ya